Set Your Word Upon My Heart; Engraved Within My Soul

It does not seem that the time of an eternity could come close to hold all that which is upon the heart of my friends, and my own heart.

My daily prayer is, "Lord, Lord, give me the words You would have me speak! Let my heart meditate upon the things Your heart meditates upon! Make me into Your image bearer; Let me be Your Azer...."

The Lord is very good, and has given enough words in my heart to last through a life time. How these words are to make their way from my heart, to my lips, into the world, I haven't the faintest idea.

My sister in South Africa ("a sister from a different mother but the same Abba, Father"), her and I have been talking over the email for a few weeks now, and she stated in her last email, which I feel absolutely compelled to share,

"What am I and what are you doing

with the wonderful conviction

God has given us?

And how dare we keep it to ourselves!"

Conviction is something that Christians feel when the Lord presses something into their heart. Something that will not, that cannot, exit from your heart; Something that refuses to quiet itself, and prods at your heart and soul and mind until it nearly drives one mad. Unless you let go, and allow it to escape in the form in which God has designed it to be let loosed.

This prodding is that of Purity.

Yes, I do mean sexual purity, but, my friends, I also mean a mental and emotional and relational purity that the world does not usually speak of. In fact, as a young adult, I have rarely (never, in fact) heard of this kind of purity, verbalized in such a way, until a sister in the Lord introduced it to me. And this for a girl raised in the church!!!

Purity is something that, I believe, my generation, a great number of us, are seeking, and yearning for and desiring with our entire hearts. But it not introduced to us in the way which the Lord would like us to be walking in - the depth which Christ intends us to chase after with fuller abandon.

Many young people are encouraged to keep journals or write letters to their future spouse. This is one way which they can keep themselves accountable and create in their minds a psychological tangibility of the idea that there could in fact be a godly man or woman also waiting for them, as they themselves are waiting.

However, as this friend stated, and which had not actually made itself fathomable to me in my own mind (if fathomable is the appropriate term - because the right words for things only come to me with great challenge)...

... that the idea has now crossed my mind(through the conversation with a dear friend and sister in the Lord) that this may not be the most healthy thing young men and women are doing for themselves, or, in fact, their future spouse and their relationship.

I, myself, now see this to be the case, to an extent.

Not only do you, as a human being, create certain expectations and a certain ideal of what your future spouse will be, look like, how they will think, act, etc., but, as my friend stated, it also creates, psychologically, a relationship with someone who has yet to materialize in your life.

Putting this plainly, they are writing letters to a figment of imagination and creating expectations and an ideal of someone whom can never be. Perhaps there will be similarities between their imaginative spouse and the spouse whom God chooses for them, of this I don't see as all that unlikely, but it does seem unfair to hold onto such childish things, especially when our fantasies only reach a certain depth (of shallowness) and real life and real relationships can be so deep, and rich, and edifying.

I have found, personally, that my imagination and fantasies are sometimes not all that edifying. Not nearly as edifying and rich and don't carry the depth which life and other human beings can offer.

Again, I do not mean to imply or say that writing to your future spouse is evil or negative, or any such thing, itself. Rather, one, as humans, and romantics, and perhaps even lonely people, tend to make it into something negative. It is a good tool for a good season to keep you accountable to someone who is to come.

Blessings in Him who Was and Is and Is to Come!!
Miss Elisabeth

(I wrote this sometime last month, or so, but didn't post it because thoughts and ideas were still coming to mind... I dearly hope it makes some sense, and so dearly wish that words were something that came a little more easily to my slow mind! Praise the Lord for those of you who God has laid many words upon your lips! You Aaron's are an amazing blessing! Speak those words which the Lord would have you speak!

God richly bless and keep you all :)

Humph!... And... *sigh*.... Really?

(For the purpose of this writing, the terms, "pastor," "preacher," "leader," "evangelist," "fisher of men," and "disciple," will all be separated into different meanings.
Being a
Pastor - a person who has a personal and emotional connection and investment with you, as someone they care about, care for, and love genuinely. They know who you are and are personally invested in your spirituality and emotional/ spiritual state of being.
Preacher- a man, or woman, who speaks publicly in the church at the pulpit on Sundays (these types of humans are much more common than pastors)
Leader- a person who carries a certain amount of charisma, which attracts others to them. People naturally flock to these people to be directed for a common vision and goal. These people have a clear direction, vision, mission, commission, calling and goal for their life: their lives are this vision.
Evangelist- a person, man or woman, who's main mission in life is to spread the gospel to the far reaches (and close knit) of the earth. They see their job in life as sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with those they come into contact with, in a formal way (public speaking, preaching, etc.)
Fisher of Men- these people are a certain type of evangelist, but less formal. Their main form of reaching the earth is through their life style, choices and how they live. In the seemingly mundane ways they shine the light of Jesus Christ.)


The whole doctrinal argument about Science vs. (or and God) has been hammering at my mind lately. Well, this is not entirely true. I do have some vague idea of why I am stuck thinking about the scientific factual evidence of God (despite the very fact that Science cannot prove anything).
Now, please don't get me wrong. This is not necessarily a questioning of the my faith (God does in fact exists; Jesus Christ, who is the Son of God did die on the cross and resurrected himself on the third day after his death; there is no way to the Father (God) except through the Son (Jesus) - this I believe), but rather a questioning and digging deeper into my faith; begging the question. Thinking the harder to think "I don't wanna 'cause my brain will hurt" thoughts. I am reading a book based around the arguments of C.S. Lewis, David Hume and Bertrand Russell, which has thoroughly captured my interest.
The ideas surrounding a non-believers conviction that there cannot be a higher Deity (a. the world is evil, b. there are two Deity's pulling against each other, c. the Deity is quite despondent and non-interested in the human condition), has thoroughly captivated my mind, and for the time being, my heart.

What is the basis behind these accusations?
Do these people have a faith in something?

What do these humans believe?

All three of these men are obviously deeply intellectual, have spent a great deal of time and thought in their convictions and beliefs, and, for the most part, they had to sacrifice something for their beliefs making them that much more believable.
As I read, I find one of my frustrations with the church surfacing: our "pastors," or more appropriately titled "preachers," do not answer the hard questions. The most common answer to the hardest of life's questions, I have seen, felt, heard, and been told myself, are:

"You just need to have faith,"

"Get over it,"

"it could have been worse,"

"at least x didn't happen,"

"it'll be OK in the end."

Ummm... can you please excuse me while I go gag...

*gag, gag, gag* *choke* *cough* *cough* *cough* *gag*

As I am thoroughly fed up, sick of, tired and worn out from, jaded because of, horrified by and embarrassed by my personal incapability to answer some of these hard questions, I happen to have set upon a personal mission to find out why in the world certain things happen, how they happen, and what Christians are called to do besides "stand by, pray, fast and read the Bible."
Alrighty, so perhaps you have picked up on the fact, over various writings, that I'm more of a "DO!" type of person. I cannot stand standing around twiddling my thumbs. If I am ever imprisoned in some small 6x6 (4x4) ft space, you can be certain that I will have a) learned another language b) written a voluminous novel, c) created a new language complete with diphthongs, feminine, masculine and neuter case endings, d) finally mastered higher math to the point of brilliancy e) gone completely and hysterically insane.
Because of this detesting for the simple, easy, basic and nauseatingly heartless.... er... normal answers to the world, I started reading 'God and the Reach of Reason,' by Erik J. Wielenberg, as well as "Dark Night of the Soul," by Thomas Moore.

This morning, pouring over Wielenberg's book, I began feeling highly frustrated, rather agitated and thoroughly malcontent. My mind began running over the various reasons that people don't believe in a Deity (brought to the table by 'God and the Reach of Reason.')

Why can't people simply be quieted with the answer, "you just need enough faith?"

Struck by the stupidity of the question, my mom's constant reminder to my siblings came to mind, "God gave you a brain! You were made to use it!"


So, my question is now,

Is it more displeasing to God for you to actually seek the Truth with all your might, asking the hard questions, begging the question, giving the question the benefit of the doubt,

or...

to not question at all and simply stuff yourself with the negligent answer of "just have faith."

(Yes, I do believe there are many things in life that don't have an answer. Human beings, by design, seem to be cravers of answers. There will be many, many things in life which will never produce an answer; at least, not until we reach the other side of Heaven. And I do believe there is a time and season to "just have faith," but I am also thoroughly convicted that "simply having faith," and doing nothing, seeking nothing, and thinking through nothing is not only slothful, but even spitting in the face of the God who created you to think!)



God richly bless you and keep you,

Miss Elisabeth

"By 1995 American women and girls were spending more than $100 million on "cellulite busters," at $60 a tube."

"Liposuction has become the most popular kind of cosmetic surgery in the United States."

"I really had little to teach them (adolescent girl students) about what it means to live in a culture of unrelenting objectification where women's bodies are used to sell everything..."

"One million teenage girls get pregnant in America every year... only 45% of the pregnancies come to term and are cared for by the biological family."

"In America, girls under fifteen are at least five times more likely to give birth than girls of the same age in other industrialized countries."

I can go on and on with the stunning statistic given in this incredible book, about the evolution of the American girl: From corset laced to promiscuity. Joan Jacobs Brumberg uses the diaries of girls from the late 1800's to the mid-1990's as the back-bone of her incredible essay on what has happened to American teenage girls, and how

there really is a need to educate them as females.

How our culture has really "dropped the ball," figuratively speaking, in regards to training up this young women in how to be wise in their decisions as young women, how to act responsibly, think maturely, and realize that when their sexuality, being powerful, ought to be protected, and then how to protect it.

Starting with Menarche, Brumberg goes through the (rather short) list of ways young women are expected to make themselves presentable to the public (which should, more appropriately, be stated as "perfecting themselves for the ever-watching media.")

From the first signs of puberty (or menstruation) to the flaw-less skin-look; from svelte, dieting and image identity to the birth of shapeliness; from the cultural obsession with showing the pelvic bone in "trendy" jeans and swim-suits to head to near-toe piercings...

Brumberg covers all those bases which define the modern-female adolescents sexuality, how it has evolved, what America's concerns SHOULD be, and what we, as individuals can do to help the younger generation be more knowledgeable in who they are as young-feminine human beings.

(p.s. the only reason I finished this book in two days was I was, quite literally, obsessed with Brumberg's ideas, and simply captivated by the statistics and history this book is saturated in)

!!RECALLED!!!

These are specific items that have been included in the recall list:

* Children's Motrin
* Children's Tylenol
* Extra Strength Tylenol
* Regular Strength Tylenol
* Tylenol 8 Hour
* Tylenol Arthritis
* Tylenol PM
* Benadryl
* Motrin IB
* Rolaids
* Simply Sleep
* St. Joseph Aspirin

You can go to the web site that contains the complete, detailed list of recalled items by clicking on this blog post title, or...
Read the news story at:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/busine...,6213281.story

Refined by Fire - FYI

Just For the what it's worth department - I updated the need list.
Sorry I haven't updated for the past several days. We have been in Ohio for my dear and loving Aunts Funeral. The funeral was honoring, beautiful and honest.

God richly Bless and Keep

Refined by Fire - Update Oct. 26, '09. PM

Mom and dad got home around 6:45 pm after being out at the house since ten or eleven this morning, meeting with the insurance company, as well as the fire seargant who was head of the investigation.


The fire started from an over-used out-let in the down stairs bathroom/ pantry. Apparently, the wires had short circuited a couple of times before this incident, and this was just the last straw. The fire probably had been going on for a good two-three (maybe five?) minutes on the ceiling of the basement/ floor of the kitchen before we actually could smell anything burning. Meaning, for those of you who know the in-depth story, the first time dad went down to check the electrical box the fire had already started.

The scoop, so far, is that the kitchen will for sure need gutted, and that corner of the house raised, as the floor of the kitchen is totally unstable (I would post pictures on my blog of our sunken in kitchen floor, and will, soon, hopefully). But because the smoke is so bad, the ceiling in the dining room will have to be redone, and the walls on the first floor will definitely have to be stripped. What is uncertain, at this point, is whether or not the smoke actually got into the walls on our second story, which leaves condemnation open for consideration. If smoke did, then the whole project will be more expensive than we can afford (outrageously so... if you don't have money pouring out of your ears). If it had not, than we will be able to strip the walls and fix up the place as best we can.

A great comfort to us right now is a word that many people from church have been telling us they are receiving in prayer:"Better than before..." "It'll be better than before..."
It's easy to think this in your head, but when it gets right down to it... well I think we are all having a pretty hard time. If condemning the house is the verdict, than we will have several bawling sessions in our house- of course we will probably take turns :)

"Lead Me to the Cross..."

Thursday, 6:20/30 AM, October 22, 2009, a fire started in the basement of our home on the great plains, and devoured the north-east corner of our basement, and kitchen floor.

Smoke damage, apparently, is worse than fire damage, and, today, as I was sorting through all of mine and my sisters belongings with some dear family friends, I saw how true that is. Trash bags, filled to the brim, are pile up in our front yard.

Water flooded our basement, and dripped, drop by drop, down from the bed room floors, through the first-floors ceiling, into the lamps, and drop-by-drop onto the floor - leaving a person feeling like they are in an abandoned shed in the amazon. Our cats inhabited our house yesterday evening, as did our dogs. It was just slightly unnerving walking into my home to see a barn cat slink around the sopping couch crying "meOOW!"

The walls are stained, and our dining room ceiling is peeling off - falling off in chunks... worse than I though.

And it sounds so horrific! Yet, through the smoke stained walls, charred basement, flooded living room, and empty bed rooms, I have been contantly amazed at God's faithfulness. He truly will "never leave nor forsake us" (heb 13:5). He is committed to us - 'til death do us part from this earth, and we fly on the wings of eternity.

And, I just heard, my older sister is currently in the ER. Prayers for her would be so very much appreciated! She is in college, her blog is http://www.blindlyservinghim.blogspot.com/

If you would, please be praying for our family. My two youngest siblings are having a very hard time, and it will be many weeks before we can move back into our home on the plain.

God richly bless and keep!

Miss Elisabeth

I just want to thank all my friends and loved ones for the educational emails over the past year.

Because of your warning I live in a zip-lock plastic bag with clean oxygen piped in after passing through 18 filters which are replaced each hour.

Thanks to you, I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.

I can’t use the remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the channels.

I can’t sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I can’t enjoy lemon slices in my tea or on my seafood anymore because lemon peels have been found to contain all kinds of nasty germs including feces.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking your nose.

Eating a Little Debbie sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can’t touch any woman’s purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom.

I must send my special thanks to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St.Theresa’s novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won’t crawl in my back seat when I’m pumping gas.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put ‘Under God’ on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

And thanks for letting me know I can’t boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face… disfiguring me for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don’t support our American troops or the Salvation Army.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neima n-Marcus since I now have their recipe.

Thanks to you, I can’t use anyone’s toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my bum.

And thanks to your great advice, I can’t ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a rapist waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

If you don’t send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large intestinaly sick ostrich will land on your head at 5:00 P.M. this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor’s ex-mother-in-law’s second husband’s cousin’s beautician.

Have a wonderful day, anyway!